Dating is like dieting… It’s easy to talk about it- easy to read about it- but how are you going to do it? How do you stick to it and do it right? Nobody sets out to fail- so important to have a plan to succeed… In relationships that plan is called boundaries…

One of God’s tools for keeping things right in your life is setting solid boundaries… Notice how He says to do that; Run from anything that stimulates youthful lust. Follow anything that makes you want to do right. Pursue faith and love and peace, and enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts. 2Timothy 2:22 NLT

There will be some hurts… But you want to avoid the ones that kill you…

Three “P”s of good boundaries…

#1- Pace…

Pace is speed. It’s a boundary that needs to be set if you hope to keep your head on straight. What pace? When you date and decide you are mutually interested in someone- you need to set a pace at which the relationship will progress…

Some people end the date with a trip to Vegas… That’s a fast pace. You say, “We are going to go slow…” Slow is not a pace unless it’s defined. In other words: what is slow?

Is there a suggested pace? What did He say? Follow anything that makes you want to do right. Following indicates a pace. Here is how to “pace” your dating relationship. Follow what? He Said, Pursue faith and love and peace… In other words; do not pursue this relationship- pursue your relationship with God and let Him work this relationship out. That way its God’s pace- not yours. You say, well it says pursue LOVE… You better know what LOVE is before you just go after it! The Bible for example says, Love is patient (1Cor.13:4). It’s the 1^st thing on God’s definition of LOVE. Also note that word “peace” in the verse. That’s so KEY… You know that there is no peace in pursuing another person! There is no peace in pursuing another person.

So there’s pace and then there is;

#2- Place…

Place is a boundary that needs to be set if you hope to keep your head on straight.

Where will you meet? How will you get there? What is acceptable alone time- or is there? Closed doors/ open doors? Place is a critical boundary.

Why? 1^st- place helps to safeguard your commitment to sexual purity… (1Cor.6:19-20) Notice how that vs. starts? Stay away from anything that stimulates youthful lust. Certain things can stimulate your desires… Like you didn’t know that. So, maybe you decide not to go to one another’s homes. Not to go into the bed room.

2^nd- place helps you keep your pace…

Maybe you decide that you will only hang out with a group of friends. Not alone. What did He say? enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.

3^rd- place helps keep your witness valuable… What is your witness? In a word it’s your “EXAMPLE”. It is one of the most valuable commodities that you have as a believer in Jesus Christ. It is one of the central tools that God will use to lead others to His Son… Keep appearance in mind… Appearance… really? Yes really! The Bible says, Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. Romans 12:17 Why? Because Jesus cares about people… He said if you cause one of the little ones to sin you would be better off if you had a boulder tied around your neck you be cast into the sea (Matt.18:6).

You see, ultimately God’s goal is not for us to find a guy or girl- but that people would know Him… He wants you to be happy but what is that? He wants others happy too…

So good boundaries are pace, place and; #3- Physical…

The physical is a boundary that needs to be set if you hope to keep your head on

straight. What did He say? Run from anything that stimulates youthful lust.

What’s He saying? He is saying set boundaries that keep you from physical mistakes…

You say, well when someone hears that I want to set up boundaries they will be out of here in a heartbeat! Good! If they have a problem with boundaries what were they after to begin with? Sounds like God’s sorting system for you!

What’s this all about? What’s the point? Why does God care about your judgment and your body and dating and all of this stuff? Well, ultimately it’s a question of usefulness… Of whether you are going to have purpose and value and be used for what you were made to do. Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to its lustful desires. ¹³ Do not let any part of your body become a tool of wickedness, to be used for sinning. Instead, give yourselves completely to God since you have been given new life. And use your whole body as a tool to do what is right for the glory of God. Romans 6:12-13